What do the lonely do for Valentine’s Day?

So today is Valentine’s Day and sometimes ,let’s face it, this day can truly suck.  Even if you  enjoy being single (sometimes I certainly do)  getting through today can be a drag.  The whole “friends with benefits” thing doesn’t quite seem so damn beneficial today. (Probably because so far I haven’t even got a “Happy Valentine’s Day” text, (really your lazy ass can’t send a text??))

You go into to work and have to smile as co-workers get gifts and partners show up to take them out to lunch and dinner.  You sit there wondering what does the fat, ugly, dumb girl have that I don’t?   Now you notice that her partner is a girl but who gives a whooooooo at least her GIRLFRIEND is taking her out…. But don’t despair (cause that just causes wrinkles etc. then you’ll be the ugly girl or guy)… I have some ideas:

  1. Treat your self great today!!! Wear the cutest, sharpest outfit you can think of!! Today is your day make it good;
  2. Eat whatever the hell you want!! I say do chocolate if it’s your thang. (I’m makeing a chocolate nutella tart)…get some lobster.  Carry- out (obviously eating alone  at a nice restaurant on valentine’s day would be crazy and more of a statement than enjoyable so get the carry-out) and eat on the good plates tonight.  Light a candle and enjoy!!
  3. Do something you love; write a blog, recite a poem, do some stand-up comedy;  I suggest something that allows you to express yourself and perhaps how silly you truly believe Valentine’s Day is (or at least how trifling the person you’re dealing with his for not getting you something); As for me I’m doing some stand-up tonight….
  4. Go to a anti-valentine’s day party.  If you can stomach other singles looking down and out, then  check out one of these functions.  At a minimum they have decent drink specials. (Guys there will undoubtedly be lots of horny women at these things so for you a no-brainer…. cheap drinks & an easy way to get laid= win, win)
  5. If you can’t stomach the anti-v-day party rent a good horror flick, thriller or if you must a comedy… nothing makes you forget valentine’s day like a good murder mystery, serial killer or the random violence of Freddy Krueger; As for me I’m doing a “Breaking Bad” marathon (I might throw in an episode or to of Snapped)
  6. Take your but to bed.  It’s only one day not a season (thank god).  Tomorrow will be Feb. 15th and you can go and get some “benefits” from your “friend”…. 😉

Lesson Learned: YOU’RE NOT LONELY, YOU’RE FABULOUS!!! LOVE YOURSELF DAMMIT!! (or eat, drink, & go to bed whichever works)

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